In the past few days I had the opportunity to experience a wide range of emotions, which I will not describe in detail as that is not what you are concerned about the most I suppose, although I will share with you what I was in desperate need of, until I actually found it. Hopefully, this short story may help you some day, even though I allow myself to believe you will not be in such situations when you need help, though life proves me wrong quite frequently, so I will just leave this piece of advice here for anyone who needs it.
A few days ago it seemed impossible for me to talk to the people close to me, about my issues, because they were more than just close to me, they were also in some way, part of the problem. Not in the way that I could not come and tell them what is bothering me just because it may be something that they did, but in the way that I already know what they are going to say, as they have already been through many different and difficult situations with me. There is only so many words of comfort a person can think of when helping others. Also, they were a little bit to familiar with me and my way of life, so I as well as them, know that whatever they say will end up being just another of my options I eventually, will not opt for. Which, now that I think of it, may be another problem of mine. I will leave that for another time, though.
Finally, my advice is, go and talk to someone who is not close to you. To someone who is not your friend, not your sibling, not your parent, not your relative, someone you just met and probably will never speak to again. Lets change the imperative and the standard that our problems should only be spoken of between us and people close to us. It is proven that that does not work sometimes. Lets find another solution. Why not do the complete opposite and share your problem with someone you have never before seen? Go talk to an old lady in the park feeding the pigeons. A buss driver if the bus is empty. A taxi driver if that is the transport you prefer. A lonely child in a park (without being creepy though). You can find a plethora of lonesome people outdoors, who you can talk to.
There is something liberating in knowing that they have no possible way of hurting you with the information you give them, or judging you about the things you say and complain about, what is more, even if they only listen to you, it matters and your soul will recognize the pain being lifted. The person you talk to may not have all the answers or even remotely understand your issues, but hey, you addressed them and that is a step forward. Although, who knows, people may surprise you and offer you the best solution you could have never thought of.
Note for the romantic ones: Maybe in a couple of years, faith will play with your lives a little and that cute boy/girl you talked to in the park about your problem once, will end up seeing you again quite unexpectedly. Why not prepare yourself for a cliche romantic comedy scene where destinies intertwine all of a sudden?
In conclusion, there is only so much pain you can carry alone. Praise yourselves from time to time, everyone who is suffering knows how hard it is to cope every day with such issues.
Hoping you will find this somewhat helpful,
Yours truly,
Encantada
